With Alone and I, we made our first film as Albedrío Artificial.

Where does it come from?
Alone and I came out of necessity. After Tócame, I had written a script based on my abstract photography series—Shadows Don’t Collide/ People Disappear. The film would give way to the birth of the skateboard, which appears in Little Blue Flower From Station to Station. In the film Shadows, three characters lived separate lives but were connected by fears which made their lives almost unlivable. After searching for a way out, the three of them meet and become different parts of a Skateboard (the board, the trucks, and the wheels), which the character of Celeste would find in the film LBF From Station to Station, helping her carry out her introspective mission. My idea was abstract, maybe a bit complex, but I began to carry it through. I filmed one character and managed to start filming the ending scene, but sadly, the project was not finished due to time and differences between the crew. For me, it was a very hard moment; my first film (with a script, camera and lights) did not exist. I felt the failure very hard and was very down. At the same time, I was going through a heavy breakup, which led me to be silent about the idea of making movies. Not long after, a colleague of mine had an interest in making movies and wanted me to write something for her. At that time, I had recently moved into a new place, one which I was going to stay for only three months. It was a project house, and I was staying in the guest room. It was a small room with only a bed and a window. The bed was made in a DIY manner, high off the ground. Here I began to experience many different things. I was processing a breakup and dealing with the idea of being completely alone, looking for myself again, looking for the person to love inside myself. Slowly, the idea for Alone and I came about. Inspired by my breakup, the desire to express such big feelings and my friend’s idea to collaborate on a project. The idea of Alone as a character is something I’ve been working on for a while. The black, shadowy hand that comes from underneath the bed is something almost everyone knows of. For me, it has been something I have experienced in my personal life. The shadow hand I have seen in dreams and childhood nightmares, some of which follow me to this day. The need to explore it has been present in my work, from my poetry to my photography. And once I wanted to start making movies, I thought to make that scary creature a character that actually means good. A fear that wants to be accepted and cherished, hugged and understood. At that time, I was carrying this mask from Peru. The same mask I used in Tócame. I really liked the hair coming out of its mouth and eyes, and thought of an idea to elaborate on it in the film. As I wrote the movie, I wanted it to be a dream, a surprise that it was about two people rather than one. A love story hidden in the personal search, and vice versa. The character of Alone made the whole thing make sense to me. I wrote it and presented it to my colleague.

How did it happen?
My friend/colleague liked the script but was not able to pursue it anymore as she was very busy. It was the end of the year, and as always, things were crazy at that time. I had recently met someone new who was interested in acting and was starting out, Leticia “Lu” Wasilewska. We got along very well, and I presented the idea to her instead. She was motivated and agreed to take part. Recently, I also met my dear friend Klauss Dupeyrat at a bar where I worked. I was playing some Peruvian music, and he came to talk to me about it with a big, warm smile. We got along well, and he liked my abstract ideas and surreal topics. I had also met Aaliyah Mogein at another job. Aaliyah would always arrive with such incredible makeup, and I was quickly drawn to it. I asked them if they would like to join the project for this dreamy film, and they accepted. It was the four of us in my little room, setting up the backgrounds and lights. I made a nice space for Aaliyah and Lu to do the makeup while Klauss and I would fix the lights and go through shots. For this film, I had only the story; I didn’t know yet how to make a shot list or anything. I just knew how to do a basic, basic script. The rest was in my head. We had set six days accordingly. I think it was six days in total; we had one day for trial shoots (which was just the basic Lima and Alone in bed scenario), and the remaining five days were the actual shooting days. Or it was seven days: one trial and six shooting days, something like that. It was a lot! I’m forever grateful for the patience to go with it. We didn’t need Aaliyah every day, so it was all planned accordingly. All of the days were planned according to everyone’s availability. Despite the intense work, we had a very nice time together. This made me very happy, as my last project did not go the same way. We formed a great bond and wanted to keep working together from that time on. Once we finished shooting, I also made the first edit rather quickly, at least from start to finish, without effects or transitions; it all came together nicely much later. It was maybe one month later when I had the idea to do an all-black performance of Alone singing to Lima. We then went to the studio of my University and made it happen; we also shot the poster for the film to take advantage of the space. Not long after, I had the idea for GRISES PERMANENTES and paused Alone and I.

What did it mean?
It was one year later that I came back to work on the post-production of Alone and I. After filming the dance scene of Alone, I came up with GRISES and embarked on that project. GRISES didn’t take long to make at all, but the whole narration to go on top of the film was the most difficult thing I’ve ever done. That took months, partly also because of university; I had to prioritise those projects first, so it all extended. In that process, I also started another relationship, so it was a lot on top of my dear film. By the time I was ready to finally close the project, a lot had happened- a lot of things that impacted the film. Firstly, I had gained much more experience in editing and sound, as well as in writing narration from GRISES. This made the project have a totally different face than when it first started. When I first had the idea, the maturity of my relationship was not so developed, and my understanding of all that had happened was not quite there yet. It was similar to Lu, who had also gone through a couple of relationships since we first filmed Alone and I. When we finally met, we worked on the dialogue, which meant recording a conversation between us, which was around an hour and a half long. I had prepared a couple of questions to ask each other, and based on what we recorded, I wrote the narration and dialogue for Lima and Alone. This was the last connecting point we needed. The film was complete in a very interesting way; the base was something, and the top of it was something else. This translates to how the film feels now, and what it all means. All of it came together with time; it was perfect for the film. Right now, I see Alone and I as a project that talks about many things; at the same time, it seems like my most straightforward project, with a clear idea and intention of subject matter. In essence, it may be a great example of what I would like to keep doing: films that are straightforward on the surface but meaningful within, carrying lots of ideas and maturity of thought.